Dog's breakfast

Poor Dusty has spent most of her time under the table since Digger arrived, hoping to avoid being boffed. I entice her into the bathroom to give her her breakfast in private, then return to the kitchen to go through the half-and-half performance with Digger. He inhales the first half in about three seconds flat, gagging as he goes. I wait a few minutes for him to compose himself, then give him his seconds, which he hoovers up in one. I send him out and, as predicted by Dan, he instantly poos in the middle of the lawn. Then he paces up and down groaning, throws up half his food, studies it for a moment and eats it up.